Ooooh man...

I so TOTALLY shouldn't be blogging right now because I have so much work that my ass might be on fire and I wouldn't be more panicked. But my procrastinating soul is forcing me to hurt myself! YES! I AM SUCH A PROCRASTINATOR THAT I AM THIS CLOSE TO BEING EMO!

Emo! Me! The happiest person in the world (when I'm not in a funk, which happens every now and then but come on who cares about that)!

Ooookay, maybe I'm exaggerating. Maybe I'm not emo.

I AM overwhelmed by work, though. That's no joke. I seriously shouldn't be blogging.

But I can't heeeeeeeeelp it!

And if we all break into song now, we could turn this tragic procrastination party into... well, a musical.

Speaking of musicals (watch me go on a tangent that has nothing to do with what I actually want to blog about), I blame Lyxie for my current obsession with Labyrinth. You know, that 1986 movie with David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly? The one with the tights and the wigs and the muppets and the amazing CG animation (this is so totally sarcasm)? Yeah, that one.

I can't believe this. I seriously fell in love with a movie. From the 80s! This is all Lyx's fault, of course. She forced me to watch it by telling me that the Goblin King was hot, and I am a total whore for movies with hot main characters. Well, he's not that hot. But somehow it doesn't matter. Because the movie is hypnotizing. I am under its spell!

And my friends seriously want to kill me now that I spend my days singing "Dance Magic Dance".

It's a sad time when even your loud-mouth friends can't stand you singing funky 80s songs.

Thanks, Lyx, you made me a social pariah! But that's okay since you redeemed yourself with that AWESOME offer that I still can't believe. Speaking of which, I just remembered that the offer was left hanging, so log in, will you! We need to talk about it. :D Bowie compells thee!

Other incredible offers have come from the last person I ever expected. Slim.

And if my perception is right, he might have asked me out. On a friendly date. But it could just be an outing between friends. But does that still count, or have I been out of it so long that I don't understand the true meaning of dating anymore?

Because I so totally know that Slim is still snogging Renee. I think. Though he was supposed to see her tonight for a movie (he loves bragging, and I love pissing him off about this twisted sort of relationship issue) and he obviously isn't since he's online and asking me to go with him downtown next Saturday.

This annoys me a little, seeing as next Saturday was my last day of work at Sears. And before you all think I got fired, don't panic. I just gave my two weeks' notice and it turns out that next Saturday would have, indeed, been my last day. While I am a little in shock at the sudden turn of events, I simply couldn't juggle a job and all the sudden schoolwork that swamped me in a grand total of four days. Four days of school and I'm already swamped! I figured things wouldn't get better and cut my ties to save my soul. It was money or uni.

I chose uni.

But yeah, turns out Slim isn't snogging Renee tonight. Because shortly after posting the second part of a story that stars him and the guys (the culmination of all our weeks of daydreaming about survival scenarios that I put into words), in which Slim and Drew, for now the only characters to have made an appearance, are privates whose battalion was exterminated and who are fighting against vicious enemies to defend the Underground City of Montreal, I got an instant message from Slim that said, in an unusually autoritarian tone:

Slim: "Okay, next Saturday, no questions asked, we're visiting underground and doing the UQÀM open house."

This is, of course, an alluring suggestion, seeing as I'd been bugging him and Rick and Drew to go downtown to visit the underground network with me. And the RÉSO (Mtl underground network of hallways, malls, metro stations/lines) is so very fun.

I can see one problem with that plan, though.

Me: "Underground?"
Me: "Also, GIMME A BREAK, NEXT SATURDAY IS MY LAST (LAST!) DAY AT WORK!"
Me: "BITCH CAN'T WE DO THIS SUNDAY?"
Slim: "But the open is on Saturday only."
Me: "But... but... D:"
Me: "Aw, geeeeeeez, fine, I'll try to tell my boss."
Me: "Soooooo, who else will be coming with us?"

This is a reasonable question. I'm accustomed to a big gang of people making one outing.

Slim: "I guess me, myself, and I."

Ominous. I'm a little shocked at the admission.

Me: "So I guess with your multiple personalities and me, that makes four."
Slim: "YES that's good."
Me: "Okay... let's try to swindle Rick and Drew for the underground part too, though. They showed some interest in that."

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I mind being alone with Slim all day. In fact, it could prove to be wildly entertaining. But it would seem inappropriate, because... well... we're just supposed to be friends. I can't act like it's a date that easily!

And then I figure...

Me: "Or would that be weird, dragging them to UQÀM?"

Considering they probably don't want to study there?

Slim: "Yes, indeed."
Me: "Wait, I'm confused. Are you saying yes to my question or to the comment above that?"
Slim: "What?"
Me: "Are we dragging the guys along or not?"

There's a rather long pause before Slim replies, "I don't know. If we can, then alright."

But his distinct lack of enthusiasm for the idea confuses me. These are his childhood friends we're talking about. Every time I go to these guys' houses, they all ―all of them!― have group pictures of each other. Let me just say that their kiddie pictures, where the bunch of them are all skinny and tiny and grinning kids, are TOTALLY adorable and they only ever scowl or look sheepish whenever I gush over them.

So it makes no sense that he'd be so unwilling to have them around. They're virtually inseperable.

Which, of course, makes me hyperventilate like, "HOMG-he-totally-just-asked-me-out!"

Which, of course, makes no sense because he would never ask me out in a million years, considering that I piss him off like you wouldn't believe (he has never forgiven me, I think, for brutally waking him up by hitting him violently with his own pillow) and he's got Renee snog all over him whenever he wants it.

Which, of course, perplexes me even more.

At any rate, I just replied with a very laid-back, qué-sera-sera comment: "Well, I suppose that settles that."

Slim: ":) lol"
Slim: (After a while of silence) "By the way, nice chapter 2."

And we descended into a long talk about the future of the story, the start of which he has inspired, caused by his and my daydreams of a Montreal-based survival story/movie/game, to which Drew contributed, and which I am charged with writing.

I'd like to say that I know what's going on, but frankly, I have no time to speculate. Excuse me, I have a LOT of work to do.

Love,
CM